one final return...

i am back. again. for the umpteenth time.

but this time, it will be different. it already is different. things are changing - though not physically, yet, but mentally things are changing. i am slowly ridding myself of temptation. i am learning what it is like to be hungry, and be okay with it. now before you go and assume i am embracing an eating disorder, allow me to explain:

before i started this one last attempt at "dieting" about 2 weeks ago, i was never hungry. i was never hungry because i hated the feeling. the emptiness in my stomach that felt like small stabs, and the rumbling of hunger was just too uncomfortable for me to ever allow it. so, i ate too much 3 times a day AND snacked too much in between to eliminate any possibility of the feeling of hunger.

so now, i drink as much water as i can to suppress the hunger pains in between my much-smaller meals, and they really are starting to get better. my stomach is shrinking. i don't have to eat as much to feel satisfied {notice i didn't say full}. i am getting used to the rumbling, meaning i am getting used to eating less. i am getting used to eating what i should be, rather than what my eyes think i should be.

other good changes i've noticed:
* i am saying no to 400+ calorie breakfast items that i used to so easily cave in to.
* i am eating "just enough" for breakfast and lunch AND i am getting some exercise in too
* i am realizing that soda really isn't all that wonderful
* i am craving less junk food

things to still work on:
* dinner - still over-eating on this one every now and then
* my sweet tooth kicks in every now and again - gotta get a handle on that
* not weighing myself so much. i used to weigh every day and it just wasn't healthy or helpful. it's too discouraging because of the ups and downs of water weight. i need to weigh myself once a month.

so there's the update on my progress. more to come.